•••

“Ripper,” Spike murmured as Giles answered the phone.

“How is he?” Giles asked nervously.

Spike leaned back on the couch. “Asleep.”

“Ah. Do you want us to stop by tomorrow?”

“Yes.”

The Watcher sighed. “Very well. We’ll be by at eight.”

“Ta.”

Once Giles had ended the call, Spike pitched the phone down on the coffee table and lay down on the couch. He was exhausted, more drained than he’d been in years. Even his tenure in the initiative’s labs hadn’t done this to him. <Bloody human.>

Truthfully, though, he knew he couldn’t blame it on the boy’s species—after all, he himself carried about massive amounts of emotional baggage. Insecurity wasn’t a stranger to the bleached menace. That didn’t make it easier to deal with in his lover, though.

It broke Spike’s heart that Xander didn’t trust him. Oh, the man knew Spike would take care of him, but he thought it was out of pity. Somehow the twisted mess that was Xander’s mind made him think that Spike would leave him now that he wasn’t human. It boggled Spike’s mind. He’d thought the boy knew more about vampires than that. After all, hadn’t the whelp made comments about Dru’s taste in bedmates?

What made the situation all the worse for Spike was that he couldn’t express this to Xander. There was no way he was going to rage at a sick man whose emotional state was less than stable. The vampire couldn’t leave the apartment—at least, not until someone else arrived to watch after Xander. During the drive back, the other members of the Scooby gang decided that Xander wouldn’t be left alone—at all—until things got back to normal. Spike immediately claimed all of the daytime. The others set up a rotation so that someone could sleep over at the man’s apartment each evening. Some of those nights Spike would be there as well. Everyone, particularly Buffy, knew that the vampire needed some time to roam, to beat things up and get gory.

Spike couldn’t quite bring himself to thank them, but he tried to make it clear that he appreciated the help. Oh, he wasn’t happy about having his and Xander’s sanctuary invaded by the others, with their curious hands and prying eyes. But they meant well and knew how to keep Xander safe.

The sun would be down in an hour, but Spike wouldn’t be going out. He shifted a bit to get more comfortable on the couch, reaching for a pillow he’d thrown on the floor earlier. He needed rest, and this was the only place he could hope to get any. If he returned to the bedroom he’d end up staring at Xander all night, wondering what he’d done wrong.

•••

Xander woke up alone, a sensation he was no longer used to. Ever since Thanksgiving, when Spike and he had gotten together, the two men had shared a bed. He was used to going to sleep next to the vampire, and usually waking up next to him—or at least knowing just where the blonde was. This morning, however, Xander was alone. He struggled with the sheets, which had twisted impossibly around his legs. Once freed, the young man walked unsteadily to the bedroom door.

He breathed a sigh of relief when he found Spike asleep on the couch. For a minute he’d been afraid that Spike had gone away, and since it was nine in the morning, the vampire wouldn’t have been returning for some time. Xander shuffled over to the couch.

His heart lurched when he saw the unhappiness and fatigue on the vampire’s face. Even in sleep, Spike looked worried and angry. The fact that Xander was the cause of that suffering just made him feel worse. He thought about waking Spike, just to tell him how sorry he was, that he’d never do anything that stupid again, and that he needed Spike to help him deal with whatever was going on. But he could tell that Spike needed his sleep, so instead of reaching down to wake the man, Xander slid to the floor and leaned against the couch. Within minutes he was asleep again, head just touching Spike’s arm.

Spike woke up feeling tired. It wasn’t something he enjoyed. He lay on the couch, eyes closed, hoping that perhaps in a few minutes he’d feel better. Vampires didn’t get sick, he knew that much. That meant that this was all mental—his mind was playing bloody havoc on him. He didn’t like that either. An odd sensation of warmth on his arm caught his attention and the vampire forced his eyes open. When he looked over, Spike found Xander asleep on the floor. The boy looked as miserable as Spike felt.

Frowning at the young man’s obstinate desire to make himself sore and uncomfortable, Spike reached over and hauled Xander up onto the couch. He shifted to make room for the lad next to him. Xander stirred and turned over, burying his face in Spike’s shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s all right,” Spike said, even though it wasn’t.

“’S not all right,” Xander murmured groggily. He hadn’t expected to be woken up by Spike dragging him onto the couch. “But I am sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Spike insisted firmly. Xander shook his head.

“Have to worry. I hurt you. Was wrong, sorry,” He moaned, pressing closer. Spike felt warm, saline tears soak into his shirt. “Sorry, sorry, sorry…” Xander chanted brokenly.

Spike realized that nothing he could say would soothe the boy—at least not right now. He just wrapped his arms around the brunette and held him tightly, hoping that he’d run out of energy or tears before too long.

Xander’s breath hitched. He knew he was breaking down, crying all over Spike…again. He just couldn’t help it—he hated hurting people, hated seeing disappointment in their eyes. What haunted him most right now was the look of utter indifference Spike had had on his face in the hospital. Was that how the vampire felt now? Had he killed whatever lay between them?

“I need you,” He whispered into Spike’s neck. “I can’t do this.”

“You can,” Spike replied. Once again, Xander disagreed with him.

“Can’t. Stupid. Can’t do anything. Can’t work. Can’t eat. Can’t bathe, can’t fight,” He cried. “Can’t say the right thing. Can’t make you…”

“Can’t make me what?” Spike asked when Xander’s voice faded. The boy just dug in deeper and kept shaking. “Xander,” Spike said more firmly, hoping the tone of voice would get his attention.

“Care,” Xander said after a moment. “Can run you off, though,” He added absently. “I—“

“You think I don’t care?” Spike asked, unable to hide his rising anger. “If I didn’t bleedin’ care I wouldn’t be here, Xander.” He got no response. “I’ve just about had it with this poor-pitiful-me, nobody loves me, I’m not worth anything shit, Xander. I’m not here because you’re the only game in town,” He added, knowing the words were harsh, though true. “Believe me, there are others in this god-forsaken hellhole who’re easier and cheaper lays. Not to mention the fact that they cry less, don’t ask for anything but a good coring, and never steal the covers.”

Xander couldn’t help but laugh at the last statement.

“I don’t pity people. I’m a vampire, for chrissakes. The only reason I’m here is because I want to be. I chose you, and I’m not going to change my mind because you got sick, or because you might not be quite as 42-chromosome, homo sapiens sapiens-human as you used to be. If I was just in it for the sex, I would’ve left weeks ago.”

Spike twisted a bit, so that Xander was lying on top of him. “And the others care, too, you know. Giles isn’t aggravated that this situation is taking up his time, Joyce doesn’t care if she misses a day of work to watch over you, Dawn’s still got a crush, even though you look like hell, Tara’s working overtime to keep Willow from concocting some spell to just ‘fix’ you, although the very prospect makes me shudder,” He continued. “And while I hate to admit it, Buffy’s even a tad concerned, although I must say it hasn’t interrupted her sex drive one iota.” That also got a choked giggle from the boy.

“You shouldn’t be ashamed for needing help, Xander, regardless of where it comes from. If you don’t want me here, I’ll leave—the others are more than happy to see you through this,” Spike said, even though the words hurt. He wanted to be that person, the one who made sure Xander was always ok. If the boy didn’t want him, though, he’d go. Maybe.

Xander shook his head. “Need you.” He couldn’t find words for it, even though he tried. He needed Spike, no one else. Xander wasn’t sure the others would really understand—had any of them been faced with turning into something else, something they’d been taught to fear? Buffy might have disliked being the Slayer, but at least she got a good deal—world savior wasn’t a bad title. Xander could only imagine what he would become. “What if I’m slimy and grow horns?”

Spike paused, not expecting the rather sudden change in topics. “I’ll have to hide you from Dru.” Xander’s head whipped up.

“You’d damned well better,” He swore vehemently. “I remember her from the love spell. Don’t take it personally, but…she scares me.”

The blonde smiled. “She scares everybody at some point or another.”

“And she likes horns and slime…” Xander muttered. “Fine, I’ll just wish for hair and extra limbs.”

“Or you could just end up being one of those demons that looks suspiciously like a human,” Spike reminded him. “You’ve not started growing anything yet, which is a good sign.”

“Right. And what kind of demon looks human?” Xander asked.

“Vampires,” Spike replied instantly. “What?” He continued when Xander frowned. “They do, most of the time. Then there are Ynt demons, and a host of elementals—if you don’t count the wings and all.”

“Spike…” Xander whined. “I like being human.”

Spike’s mouth twisted into an evil grin. “But if you’re a demon, pet, I can paddle you.”

Xander’s jaw dropped. “You wouldn’t.”

The evil grin softened a bit. “Only if you asked nicely.” The boy’s pulse spiked, telling him all he needed to know. “And return the favor.”

The idea of chaining Spike down and lashing at him a bit must have appealed to the kid, because he dropped his face back down—probably to hide his blush. “So, how many more of these sappy, emotional, girly conversations are we going to have to have?”

Xander lifted his head again. “Er…I don’t have any scheduled…”

“Because every time I think things are going fine, we end up doing the ‘emotional catharsis’ thing. If I wasn’t an evil, undead *male* demon, I’d swear someone was slipping me hormones,” Spike added.

Xander laughed. “Me too. I’m all for no more messy tears-and-unhappiness scenes. Not that I can promise I won’t initiate another one,” He said. “Oh, look. I used a Giles-word.”

“I won’t tell,” Spike said, hugging the boy to him again. “But I might beat you senseless if you put us through this again.”

“Promise?” Xander asked hopefully.

Spike growled. “Fine. I won’t beat you senseless if you do this again.”

“Ok. I’ll try,” Xander whispered. “Or, we could…”

“No,” Spike replied quickly. “I don’t want to know, because it probably involves the others.”

“How did you know?” Xander asked incredulously.

“You had that ‘I wanna torture the Slayer’ look on your face,” Spike said. “And as much as I enjoy that pastime, I’m not using this part of our personal life to do it. Shagging, yeah—she still cringes when we snog. But this? No.”

Xander cocked his head to one side. “You’ve got a point. That might be embarrassing.”

“You’d ruin my reputation,” Spike murmured. “Who’d be afraid of a vampire who could do a guest spot on Jerry Springer?”

They looked at each other for a minute. “Never mind.” Hells, they’d both be scared shitless of a vampire who’d survived that show.

“Can we get up?” Xander whined. “I’m hungry.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Yeah, fine. Gotta clean a bit, too. Rupert and the girls are stopping in this evening.”

“Ah. Babysitters?” Xander muttered as he let Spike sit him on the couch. Apparently Spike was cooking, if the whole blanket-around-the-body mummy thing was to be believed.

Spike leveled a no-nonsense look at him. “You didn’t exactly earn trustworthiness points with the gang with your little stunt, you know. And they’re not too happy with me for letting you slip away.”

Xander looked up at him with big, wet eyes. “Sorry,” He whispered. When Spike scowled and began to say something about his backsliding behavior, Xander continued. “Are you going to put me on a leash now?”

Spike gulped. “That could be arranged, yes.” They stared at each other for a long time. “Um, breakfast. Is oatmeal ok?”

“Not unless you want to scrape it off the ceiling,” Xander replied. “There are grits in the cupboard.”

•••

When Giles, Willow and Tara showed up at Xander’s apartment, they were more than a little surprised to hear laughter on the other side of the door. They knocked tentatively, hoping that they hadn’t wandered into an alternate universe. The Spike-and-Xander they’d left yesterday definitely didn’t fall into the ‘happy-laughter’ category.

Spike answered the door, still nearly doubled over. Xander had just finished regaling him with high school stories, particularly ones about him and Cordelia and their closet escapades. The vampire had heard bits and pieces over the years, but getting the whole story all at once was really something…well, other than the not-so-nice ending. He knew a bit more about that than he’d like to openly admit. He only sobered up a little when he saw the three of them in the hall. “Come on,” He muttered, waving them inside.

“I assume your state is due to positive circumstances,” Giles asked as Spike closed the door.

“Giles!” Xander exclaimed, swiveling around on the couch. “I was just telling him about some high school stuff.”

Willow grinned. “There were some funny things…in between all the evil nasties.”

“So…” Xander looked up at Spike. “You’re off?”

Spike tensed briefly. “Yeah. I’ll be back later.”

“Have fun,” Xander said brightly. “And kill something for me.”

“Will do, luv,” Spike promised as he pulled on his duster.

Giles just lifted one eyebrow. Tara and Willow giggled. Xander grinned.

“And bring me back an ear!” Xander added as Spike slipped out the door.

“Do you have to be so…” Giles started, rubbing his forehead. It was all an act, though. He was ecstatic to see Xander cheerful—the boy hadn’t been that way since first falling ill.

“Yes, he does,” Willow stated. She moved around the couch to sit next to Xander. “So what’s on the agenda for the evening?”

“Erm…I get to grovel and beg forgiveness, followed by several lectures covering my stupidity, and culminating in the consumption of the pizza I ordered a few minutes ago,” Xander said in his best happy voice.

Giles looked over at Tara, who was looking at Willow. Perhaps they should revamp their plans. “Why don’t we watch a movie instead?” Willow offered. “Well, and eat the pizza.”

Xander looked skeptical. “What, no lectures? No berating, no sad Willow-eyes telling me I was bad, no Gilesian discussions on responsibility and impetuousness. Note use of big word,” He continued.

“You seem to be doing rather well yourself,” Giles replied evenly. “And I suspect that Spike covered most of those topics before our arrival.” The vampire hadn’t said anything to them, but the Watcher knew that he planned on straightening out Xander on a few key issues. None of them had heard the conversation between the lovers in the emergency room, but from the look on Spike’s face when he emerged, it hadn’t been good. Now, though, things seemed better, even approaching normal…if they could be called that.

Xander sighed. “Yeah, I’m working on the self-flagellating thing. A hobby, maybe. Seriously, though, I’m sorry for doing that to you—it was selfish.”

“Yeah it was,” Willow replied bluntly. “But you won’t do it again, right?”

“Nope,” Xander swore. “At least, not without telling you first. Then you can stop me. And I won’t do it.”

“Good to know,” She said with a grin. “Movie?”

“Sure. What do you want to watch, Tara?” Xander asked, drawing the blonde into the conversation. She’d been trying to hide behind herself ever since arriving.

“I-I don’t really…” Tara began, looking desperately at Willow. The redhead smirked. Tara frowned, seeing that she wasn’t going to get any help from that corner. “Night of the Living Dead is on at nine,” She said desperately, remembering it from the morning’s paper.

Xander’s jaw dropped. “You *like* that movie?” Giles’ expression mirrored Xander’s words.

“No,” She began slowly. “But it’s all I can think of.”

“Ah. Perhaps Xander has something in his rather considerable collection that would be more appropriate,” Giles suggested, knowing that he’d hate anything the youth owned.

Xander thought for a moment. He recognized the skeptical look on Giles’ face. “I’ve got an idea.”

Fifteen minutes later the foursome was ensconced on couch and chairs, slurping pizza—although Giles would forever deny slurping anything—and waiting for the movie to start.

“Some Like it Hot?” Giles whispered reverently. He looked over at Xander. “*You* own this movie?”

Xander just grinned.

•••

Spike grinned as yet another fledgling exploded in a cloud of dust. He’d gone out to find a spot of violence so that he could work off his frustrations. Much to his surprise, he didn’t run into Buffy, although he was working in the area she usually patrolled. The vampire was glad, though, that she was elsewhere. He was in a better mood now than he’d been the day before, but at the same time, he needed a bit of solitude.

Things were better between him and Xander, which helped to tamp down the acidic fear that kept threatening to consume him. He knew, though, that things were probably going to get worse well before they got better. It didn’t help that no one had a clue as to what caused his lover’s illness. They hadn’t run across any prophecies, nor angered any sorcerers or crossed any demon clans that would do this sort of thing. Unless there was a new bad guy in town, which Spike would’ve heard about, they were left with nothing.

And that frustrated the vampire to no end…which was very bad for the town’s vampire and demon population. At the rate he was going, Restfield would actually be a safe place to be at night, not that he’d recommend it to Xander.

Spike had about given up on finding more opponents in the quiet graveyard when he spotted some Fyarl demons carrying off a college student. He grinned and pocketed his stake, trading it for a long dagger. Fyarl demons were always a fun lot…dumb, but feisty opponents. And, they usually worked for someone…which meant another fight.

The blonde wasn’t surprised to see Buffy join him a few minutes later. She was alone, and Spike assumed Austin wasn’t in town—the boy followed her everywhere when he could. “They grabbed her in front of the library,” Buffy whispered as she and Spike tailed the demons.

“Just those three?” Spike asked.

“Yep. I’ll get the kid, you distract the uglies,” Buffy suggested as they neared the demons, which were completely oblivious.

Spike grinned and moved forward. Yeah, this was gonna be fun.

•••

Xander opened his eyes, silently cursing whatever had woken him up. He’d been hoping/praying to be able to really take advantage of the best night’s sleep he’d had in a month. But no, something had to nudge him into consciousness. He looked around curiously, but nothing jumped out at him—no sunlight pouring in through the window, no water dripping from the ceiling. Yeah, he could hear Spike in the kitchen, frying bacon and playing… Britney Spears, if he wasn’t mistaken. That wasn’t usually enough to wake him, so he dismissed the sounds, even though he really, really hated that song.

After another minute, Xander realized that he wasn’t going to figure it out just lying in bed. He got up and headed for the door. Maybe Spike had dropped something? Or someone had called? If he could find someone to blame for his current conscious state, he was going to pummel them.

“Hey, Spike,” Xander mumbled, sliding onto a barstool. “Did you…”

Spike looked up from the stove, obviously surprised to see Xander. He’d heard the lad get out of bed, but had figured he’d just head to the bathroom, then fall asleep again. It had been his normal pattern of behavior lately. “Did I what?”

“Something woke me up,” He replied. “But I don’t think you playing Britney Spears is enough to do it. I was wondering if someone called.”

Spike frowned. “No one called, and I don’t have any music on.” He cocked his head. “Xander, do you hear…” The vampire’s eyes widened. “You can hear that?”

Xander gave Spike a ‘duh’ look. “Yeah. What I don’t get is where you hid the album. Although I can certainly understand why you’d hide it.”

The blonde turned off the stove and walked around to the bar, sitting on a stool next to the boy. “Xander, I’m not playing the bloody music. The twit downstairs is.”

“Oh.” Xander thought for a moment. “I can hear that?”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Apparently, yeah. Y’ok?”

Xander smiled. “Yeah, I think so. Actually, I feel pretty good. You gonna finish breakfast?” He knew that Spike wanted to talk about his suddenly improved hearing, but he didn’t…not yet, at least. “’Cause I’m starving.”

The vampire sighed and stood up. “Yeah, I’ll finish breakfast. Although technically it’s dinner.” He returned to the kitchen and resumed cooking.

“So, whatcha doin’ tonight?” Xander asked as he watched Spike cook. He felt good, better than he had since he’d first gotten sick, and he thought that maybe…just maybe…if whatever Spike was doing wasn’t too dangerous, he’d get to go. Even if it was just sitting at the Magic Box. Xander was stir-crazy, more so than he’d been in ages.

“Haven’t decided. Rupert wants help with some soddin’ prophecy,” Spike replied as he dished up food. Xander took the plate and glass of orange juice before leaping on the opportunity he saw.

“I could help with the prophecy,” He offered in between bites. “I’ve got most of the prophetic languages down.”

Spike leveled a distinctly serious look at the young man. “Rest, recuperation. Neither of those concepts involved running around town.”

“But I feel good!” Xander whined. “Really good. And I’m tired of staying around here all the time.”

“You haven’t been here all the time,” Spike reasoned. “You did go visit Joyce last Saturday.”

“I sat in her living room and slept,” Xander shot back. “It’s not going to tire me out, sitting in the shop reading books. And if I do fall asleep, you’ll just carry me to the car and bring me back here, like you did when I fell asleep at Joyce’s.”

Spike sat down again. He should’ve seen this coming. The boy may have not realized it, but he’d been getting better—stronger, every day. Now he felt good, for once, and wanted to go out and enjoy it. That was all well and good until he ran out of steam. “No.”

Xander snarled. “I want to get the hell out of this apartment. I need to do something. I can’t just lie around anymore.” He hoped that he continued to feel good, so that he could go back to work. He actually missed it.

“I don’t think you’re ready to expend yourself like that. Perhaps there’s something around here you’d like to do. Or Rupert could bring some books over,” Spike reasoned, hoping that maybe just arguing about it would tire the young man out.

A thought occurred to the brunette. Spike did have a point—there were other ways to entertain oneself… He leaned over a bit, so that his breath could ghost over Spike’s face. “Or we could go back to bed,” he murmured suggestively.

Spike tensed up briefly. He’d been refraining, rather valiantly, from pushing himself on the boy. It was bad form to force a sick man to suffer one’s attentions…or something like that. “Xander… you’re—“

“Horny,” Xander interjected. “We haven’t done anything in forever. I can’t even remember the last time you fucked me,” He grumbled. “It had to have been before I got sick. That was a month ago. A month! We’re living like monks here, Spike, and that’s just not right.”

<Whelp has a point,> Spike thought. He’d been getting rather well acquainted with his hands during his lover’s illness. “Fine. Only if you lay back and let me do all the work, though.”

Xander grinned and jumped up. He wasn’t going to argue, not when nookie was forthcoming. “Come on, Spike. Bed awaits!” Spike slowly stood up and followed the bouncing young man back into the bedroom. He was about to reach for the young man when Xander attacked.

“Xander…” Spike growled as the brunette toppled him onto the bed. He tried to catch Xander, but the boy moved like greased lightening, pulling on Spike’s clothes even as he captured the vampire’s mouth in a slick, hot kiss. Spike arched up into mischievous hands, worries about tiring the boy fading in the face of rising desire. He needed this, craved it. After a month of nursing Xander, of constantly touching him but never *touching*, he was desperate.

Xander finally got both his and Spike’s clothes off, even without the vampire’s assistance. Spike was occupied with trying to fuse their mouths together, which Xander didn’t mind in the least. The brunette eased his weight up onto his arms and aligned their straining cocks. The first tentative thrust made both men groan. Spike brought his hands up to Xander’s hips, bearing much of the boy’s weight even as he controlled their coupling. Xander trailed his mouth down Spike’s throat, enjoying the sound of Spike whimpering when he bit hard into the cool, smooth skin there.

Their coming together was too good to last, though. They’d been apart for too long; the strain of worry and illness only added to their frantic pace. Xander came hard, screaming into Spike’s shoulder as he shuddered and jerked. A few thrusts later, Spike joined him, howling softly even as he let Xander’s weight drop on top of him.

“You were supposed to let me do all the work, whelp,” Spike muttered when he found his voice.

Xander grinned into Spike’s shoulder. “Fine. You can clean us up.”

Spike grinned foolishly. He couldn’t stay mad at the boy, not when he so obviously felt better. The vampire rolled them onto their sides before picking Xander up and getting out of bed. The boy mustn’t have used up all his energy, because while Spike tried to turn on the water Xander reached over and began to tickle him. “None of that!” Spike warned, batting away those naughty fingers. Xander laughed and tried again, aiming for Spike’s sensitive knees.

The vampire spun around, unaware of just how close Xander had gotten to him from his perch on the commode. He ran smack into the boy, sending both of them reeling toward the counter. He reached around behind Xander, hoping to catch the man’s head before it could strike the hard surface. As it turned out, he didn’t need to do a thing. Just when Xander should have hit the linoleum-covered block, his body shimmered slightly and he fell through the cabinet.

“Spike?”

“What?” The blonde murmured, staring at Xander. The brunette was lying at a very odd angle, legs draped over the toilet, torso bending toward the floor, and his arms and head well inside the vanity.

“Why can I see the Lysol?” Xander inquired calmly. “And eww… somebody needs to clean out this cabinet. There are dead things in here. Is that a cockroach?” The boy rolled over, bringing himself out of the cabinet as he swung his legs down. Once he was seated firmly on the floor, he looked up at Spike. “Er…”

Spike sat down on the edge of the tub, reaching over to turn off the water. He propped his head in his hands and stared at Xander. His boy had just fallen *through* a solid object. “Waterbug.”

“What?” Xander asked, cocking an eyebrow questioningly.

“It was probably a waterbug. I sprayed for roaches last week,” Spike reminded him. “We should probably tell Giles about this,” He continued. “And the hearing thing.”

Xander nodded slowly. “Yeah, cause this is weird.” He reached out to touch the cabinet, obviously relieved when he didn’t sink through it again. “Because I don’t want to have a bathroom counter that’s some weird transdimensional thingy.”

“Ah,” Spike said quietly. He watched as Xander poked the cabinet, and then the commode.

Xander looked around. He was fairly sure that whatever had just happened was a newly acquired ability, one he could attribute to his recent illness. How did it work, though? He kept feeling things, hoping to figure out how to trigger the event again. Maybe it had to do with danger, or something like that. Testing his theory, Xander made a fist and slammed it at the commode. “Eww, toilet water,” He whined when he found his hand immersed in the toilet bowl. “You did clean this, right?”

Spike glanced into the clean bowl. “Yesterday. Um… why do you have your hand *through* the toilet?” This was all a bit surreal. Maybe his blood had been spiked.

Xander focused and pulled his hand back out. He tried it again on the cabinet, this time just thinking hard. It worked, and he grabbed the Lysol can. Much to his surprise, it came back with him. “Now that’s handy,” He commented, tossing the canister up into the air.

Spike caught the can on its descent. “Yes, it certainly is. I think we should get cleaned up and find Rupert.” He was sure the Watcher could figure something out. If not, he’d find a way to gut the man.

Xander stood slowly and joined Spike at the bath. “But can we take a warm shower?” He asked, feeling the ice cold water in the tub.

“Picky, picky,” Spike murmured, running some hot water.

•••

“Xander?” Giles exclaimed when he saw the young man walk into the Magic Box. “Is something…”

Xander grinned. “I’m feeling better, G-man, that’s all.”

“And he fell through the cabinet,” Spike added, causing Xander to hit him on the shoulder. “You know I can hit you back now,” He warned.

“I know,” Xander replied evilly.

“You fell through a cabinet?” Giles inquired. “What does that mean?”

Xander sighed and flopped down onto a chair. “It means I tripped and fell into a cabinet, only instead of hitting it,” He said, rapping his hand on a table, “I went through it,” He continued, sending his arm through the table. Giles’ jaw dropped.

“Oh my word. And this just happened today?” The Watcher inquired.

Spike nodded. “Yeah. His hearing’s a bit better too.”

Giles immediately went to a bookshelf. “This may be the thing we were looking for—the ability to phase shift is very rare,” He rambled as he pulled books off the shelves, tossing them at Spike. “Start looking for demons that can do that.”

Xander accepted a book from Spike and began to read. The vampire also started looking—he wanted to know what Xander was too. “When do the others get here?” Xander asked after while, wondering where his friends were.

“Later,” Giles mumbled, engrossed in his text. “They had something to do at school.”

“Iupbi demons can phase shift,” Xander announced half an hour later.

“You’re not an Iupbi demon,” Spike said quickly.

Xander looked over at the vampire. “How do you know?”

Spike glanced up. “They’ve got a third eye, green skin, and breath so foul it’d kill a vampire, mate.”

“I agree that perhaps that diagnosis is unlikely,” Giles concurred.

When Willow, Tara and Buffy arrived, Austin in tow, the Watcher put them to work reading up on demons. “No prophecy research?” Willow asked. She didn’t mind not working on it, especially since Giles had already specified that Spike would be doing most of the work, and besides that this was about Xander.

“No, that can wait until tomorrow,” Giles replied. “We need to know what Xander is now.”

“Ztedt demon?” Buffy inquired. “Phase shifting, good hearing… never mind.”

“What?” Xander asked. “Why the ‘never mind’?”

The Slayer blushed. “Erm… Ztedt demons are all female.” Xander’s face turned red.

“Definitely not that then,” Spike murmured. “We checked.”

“Eewww. Didn’t need to hear that,” Buffy whined. “Fine. That’s what, two that you’re not?”

“Three, since I don’t think he’s a Chdarkian rat demon,” Willow added. “They can phase shift, but they look like, well, rats.”

“Don’t even think of saying a word, Buffy,” Xander said to the Slayer. “Just don’t.”

Buffy tried to look innocent. “Who, me?”

“Checked that too,” Spike murmured. “His bollocks aren’t big enough to be a rat’s.”

Buffy slammed her book into her forehead. “Can I research in the training room?”

“Yes, and please refrain from using my books as a torture device,” Giles said absently.

“Why not? You do,” She shot back, carrying her book to the training room. The door slammed hard behind her.

“I guess I’m not a chaos wizard, am I?” Xander inquired. “I mean, I think I’d remember that.”

Giles looked up. “No, you’re very definitely not a chaos wizard.”

“No overwhelming urge to shag Ripper,” Spike commented. Giles glared at the vampire.

“I’m going to go with Buffy on the ‘eeww’ thing,” Xander whispered to Spike.

“I thought someone said that there weren’t many demons that can do this stuff,” Xander complained some time later.

“Ah. Perhaps I should be more specific. Demons who can pass for human who can also phase shift are quite uncommon,” Giles murmured. “And not an area in which any of us specialize.”

“What about this one?” Tara said softly, holding a book out to Giles. “Humanoid, phase shifting, good hearing.”

Giles took the book and read the description. “Physical appearance is almost identical to a human, other than the presence of additional eye membranes. Has superior hearing, slightly superior strength and speed. Known primarily as transdimensional phase-shifters who use their abilities to travel quickly both within and between dimensions. Immortal.”

“Hmmm… I guess we can put it on the ‘maybe’ list, along with all the others we haven’t found,” Xander commented. “What’s it called?”

“That would be a Bhavca demon,” Giles replied. “And sounds rather likely, although I would suspect that you would need considerable training to fully realize your abilities.”

Tara looked over at Willow, who was just staring at Xander. “Willow?” When the redhead didn’t respond, Tara placed a hand on the girl’s shoulder. “Are you ok?”

“Bhavca demon?” Willow whispered.

Giles swiveled in his chair. Willow looked stricken, almost distraught. “Willow, is something wrong? There is nothing particularly horrid about Bhavca demons. They aren’t common, but neither are they evil. Although I do wonder how Xander would become one, since they aren’t known for their ability to reproduce by transmogrification.”

Willow just stared. How had this happened? What were the chances that something else had affected Xander? After all, they’d never encountered a Bhavca demon, and weren’t likely to either. “How?”

The Watcher took in Willow’s odd response. He had a very bad feeling about this. There was no reason for the young witch to be so upset—after all, they may have just found out that Xander wasn’t in danger of becoming a monster. “Willow, is there something you need to tell us?”

Willow blinked. “I… I don’t understand. How could he be a Bhavca demon? I made up a banishing potion, not a summoning spell.”

Tara’s jaw dropped. “Banishing potion?” She whispered. “What banishing potion?”

Giles looked up at the ‘restricted section’. “Willow, what spell did you cast?”

The redhead looked over at Giles. “I made up a banishing potion for a Bhavca demon, but you threw it out.”

Spike tried to follow the conversation while simultaneously ripping the arms of his chair to shreds. He was holding on rather fiercely so that he wouldn’t launch across the table and eviscerate the girl, chip or no. Xander, too, was restraining himself, although he didn’t seem to be quite as angry as the vampire. “Willow, just what was this potion? When did you do this?”

Willow missed the ominous tone of Xander’s voice. “It was about a month ago. I made up the potion and poured it into a cup, but Giles threw it away—I saw him. It was the same day you got sick, actually…”

Giles’ head shot up. “I did not discard any potions that day,” He replied. “And I do rather distinctly remember the evening in question. Willow, please retrieve the spell you used.”

Willow climbed the ladder and got the spell book. When she returned, she handed the book to Giles, opened to the correct page. “I don’t see how it could have done this. It must be a coincidence.”

Tara moved over to look at the book. She had to agree with Willow—the incantation on the potion was rather concrete. Giles, too, nodded. “Although such a coincidence is unlikely, I cannot say this potion would have had these effects.”

Xander reached for the book, which Giles gave to him. The boy looked over the ingredients, not seeing anything unusual. The incantation was straightforward and simple, written in a vulgar form of Shaesdei. “What does it say?” Spike asked, running a finger along the words.

“I call upon the eternal waters of darkness and the black fires of chaos to banish the demon Bhavca,” Xander said, pointing to each word. “See, Majhit-ka is ‘eternal waters’, krae disz is ‘black fires of chaos’, ‘Cetneirkmu’ is the Shaesdei word for Bhavca demons, and ‘diened’ is banish,” Xander continued. Caught up in the language, he rambled on. “The use of diened is unusual. It’s from the root verb ‘mienein’, which is an existence verb in Shaesdei. The main conjugates are ‘dienien’, to banish, and ‘tienien’, to birth or bring forth.” He peered at the book. “Actually, whoever wrote this had really bad penmanship. The ‘d’ looks like a ‘t’, doesn’t it?” He commented, pointing at the badly drawn script.

“I guess,” Spike murmured. Something occurred to him. “Red, you wouldn’t have happened to have…misread this spell, would you’ve? You know, mistaken a ‘d’ for a ‘t’?”

Willow hadn’t been paying attention to Xander and Spike’s conversation. “I might have, it wasn’t really well written, so it was hard to read. But forget about it; that spell isn’t a summoning spell, so it couldn’t have done this to Xander. It must have been some evil wizard planning to do something bad.”

“Uh, Giles?” Xander said hesitantly. “If you changed this one word—“

“I heard you the first time, Xander, and yes that would change the potion into a transmogrification spell,” He said, standing up. “Which I should have seen immediately.”

Willow made a high pitched squeaking noise. “But I didn’t—“

“What? Mean to?” Xander asked angrily. “Mean to trip over your tongue? Mean to somehow turn me into a demon? Hells, I probably drank it with the Kool-aid,” He muttered.

Tara stood and backed away from Willow. She didn’t trust herself not to zap her girlfriend in the posterior. Giles looked over at Tara with a sad face. He knew what she was going through—they had both been worried about Willow’s magic use, and now an innocent bystander was paying the price.

Willow looked at her friends, who were backing away and glaring—and in the case of Spike, growling. “It’s not like I meant to do it!” She defended. “I didn’t! It was a mistake, just a simple mistake. I was practicing my potions, and it went a little off.”

Spike jumped up and leaned over the table. “A bit off?” He hissed, morphing into gameface. “You saw what ‘a bit off’ did to Xander. What if it hadn’t been ‘a bit off’? What if you’d fed him a real banishing potion?”

Xander shuddered, not wanting to imagine his misery if he’d been subjected to that. “Willow, I’m a demon. You know how I feel, have always felt, about demons.” He shot a smile at Spike, who nodded. Spike knew he was a rare exception to Xander’s general dislike of Hellmouthy things. “Yeah, there are a few I don’t mind, even like, but I never wanted to BE a demon!”

Willow scrambled for some way to fix this. “But you’re immortal now! And you can do that neat phase-shifting thingy!”

“What’s going on in here?” Buffy asked from the training room door. “You guys are shouting a lot.”

“Willow here turned Xander into a Bhavca demon,” Spike growled. “But that’s not a bad thing, according to the witch.”

Buffy’s eyes widened. “Willow?” She squeaked. “YOU turned Xander into a demon? Why?” She walked over to the group. “Giles, why did Willow turn Xander into a demon?”

Giles turned hard eyes toward the redheaded witch. “She was careless and sloppy and he suffered for it,” The Watcher replied harshly. “Regardless of how she tries to twist the situation.”

Willow fumed and ground her teeth. How dare he berate her for trying to improve her abilities. “It’s not like he’s dead or anything! Besides, now he can help Buffy more. You should be grateful, Xander, not getting all mad at me!”

Xander caught Spike before the vampire could leap over the table and tear the witch apart. “That’s it, we’re gone,” He snarled, pulling a hissing, gamefaced Spike toward the door. “Giles, call later, ok?”

“Yes, I will,” Giles replied to the retreating men. “Buffy, perhaps you and Tara should go on patrol now. I believe I need to have a word with Ms. Rosenberg.”

Buffy nodded and took Tara’s hand. The blonde witch looked lost, and Buffy could see why. The Willow standing in the Magic Box wasn’t the one she, or the other girl, knew. Not at all. “Come on, we’ll go find a nice, quiet cemetery and not stake anything.” Tara smiled tremulously and followed the Slayer out the door.

Giles turned back to Willow. “Sit down.” His voice brooked no argument.

Willow sat.